Turn arounds

Its hard to say the how, the when or the why it happens. We've been feeling stuck lately, sorting out schedules, needing to make some significant changes and feeling lost in that, and dealing with the death of my dad two weeks ago. It has been heavy and depressing, even as we pressed in in prayer for so many people who are suffering from life-threatening illnesses - Ben Towne, Marina Mitskevich, Tina Thomas, Jason Mattax, and Pete Sheldrup.

Pastor Bill Johnson noted on Jesus' parables about prayer:

• the friend who comes to his neighbor at midnight asking for a loaf of bread for his guest; the neighbor won't give it because he is a friend, but because the neighbor is going to wake the children if he continues
• the widow who comes to the unjust judge for justice; he won't give it except that she keeps coming and bothering him, so he gives her what she asks for

Johnson says that there are prayers that God answers because we are His friends, and prayers He answers because He is the just judge, but there are prayers that are only answered because we persevere and press in for the answer.

While we haven't seen the level of healing that we are pressing in for, as I pressed in to Jesus this morning, I felt a cloud lift and a lightness of heart that I haven't felt for a while. I saw Jesus standing there, glorious, full of the fire of love and holiness, and had to look away as the cloud dispersed. His presence moved my eyes away from focusing on all that is before me as though it were telling me the truth of things. His invitation is to keep seeking Him, to keep pressing in, to keep asking, seeking and knocking; but to look to Him and keep looking - the Author and Perfecter of our Faith.

Wet Saturdays in August

Things are moving forward at Tierra Nueva. What that means is that we know things need to change and are having conversations about it, but not clarity as to what the change is to look like. There have been plenty of prophetic words about thinking "outside the box" and "beyond what we can imagine" so how do you get your thoughts around that?!

One thing that is clear that seems to be preparatory for this change concerns the tension between "entering the Kingdom as a little child" and growing up in Jesus. The Spirit is moving people away from a reactionary stance on all things that smack of the Law, for "those who are led by the Spirit are no longer under the law." But this still means submitting, obeying and following the Spirit.

There is also a realization that Tierra Nueva isn't what it used to be, which was solely a mission outreach. It is becoming a church. The image we discussed was the strawberry plant - each plant sends out runners so that a strawberry patch is a vast colony of one plant. In Latin, the runner is called an apostolos. Go figure. For years, TN has functioned as a para-church, but what we are discovering is that in the going, something has taken root and a mission community is growing that has all the parts of the plants, all necessary and equally valued. This is a big shift.

Blasphemy!

There have been days when I find myself the older brother in Jesus' parable of the prodigal son - actually that is most days... grace is hard for me. I try so hard to be right. And it seems as though one of the reasons we are at Tierra Nueva is to begin to dismantle that as I am regularly confronted by a love and acceptance of others, and an accompanying theology (as it were) that scandalizes me. My friend and co-worker, Chris, is a wondeful vehicle of this for me. I find that one of my regular responses to some things he says is, "I'm really not comfortable with that idea." He smiles and says, "Let's dance!"

Last week I was reading in Mark 2, where the four friends bring their paralyzed friend to Jesus and tear the roof off the house so they can get him close to Jesus. This is one of my favorite encounters in the gospels. As I was reading, I was thinking my thoughts about it, thoughts I have had in the past, good thoughts, insightful thoughts, but my thoughts. I stopped and asked Jesus - "Jesus, I know what I think about this passage. What do You want to show me here?" And very quickly I heard Him say, "I want you to see that they called Me a blasphemer."

I realized that I have not been scandalized by Jesus - and that is a scandal itself. Other than His claim to being the Way, the Truth and the Life (an exclusive claim), my thinking about Jesus has often glossed over the things I don't understand or am not comfortable with. I have stuck with the things with which I am comfortable or feel I can explain. In other words, I have a Jesus that is made in my image. Jesus was considered a glutton and a sinner by the religious leadership. And I am part of today's religious leadership. Thomas Jefferson made his own version of the bible where he removed everything supernatural or miraculous, probably because that scandalized his intellect. But I think we have all edited the gospels and the person of Jesus to fit (or even justify) our religious and cultural worldview. We need to let Jesus expose those cultural justifications and versions of Himself in our thinking. And that is really hard while we are still immersed in that culture. It is so ingrained in our thinking and living that it is like asking a fish to describe water. I can talk about it as an idea but living it feels like it takes more and much will resist it. I feel the resistance in me even here. I am just like the disciples who don't get it, not just about Jesus as the Son of God, but about the scandalous love of God the Father that sent His Son into the world. Jesus, friend of sinners.

I think we need to leave. We have been given the gift of leaving and having our cultural and religious assumptions regularly exposed. It would be more difficult if Tierra Nueva had come to our Seattle church and done a conference and then left. It feels like Peter and James and John leaving their family businesses, and Matthew leaving his tax booth. Is Jesus calling you to leave in order to follow Him?

Troy's Art Show

It was really amazing how the crew at Tierra Nueva transformed our space into an art studio! This was the unveiling of the mural he has been working on for two years in its various manifestations - and it was truly astounding to hear him talk about all the things that had been part of his journey in living and working with people from the margins that make up the mural. It was the gospel message - we should have had an altar call instead of an auction! But the auction and sales of other of Troy's work will give him plenty of money for his trip. He leaves for France on Sunday for a year. I didn't really appreciate what a treasure he is. I will miss him.

Intercession

Twice now I have been on my way out the door on a Monday evening when our co-worker, Chris, stops me and asks me if I have time to pray for some of the guys he works with. Intercession is new for him. He says that most of his life he believed "praying for" people--from a distance--was kinda useless. "I'll keep so and so in my prayers," he'd always hear. Yeah, right. "Will you keep me in your prayers?" Um, probably not. What does that even mean or look like?

Chris heard from his friend's girlfriend that after finishing his first year at college (which is a miracle in itself, having gone through gang drive bys, hospitals, jail, deportation prison with me, and having lost all his scholarships all within six months before enrollment) he was back in his dad's trailer, drinking, drunk, being visited by the old gang members, and threatening to give up on everything before his immigration trial that is fast approaching. Chris freaked out.

Normally, he'd feel guilty, like he hadn't done enough, and jump in the car to go find him, scoop him onto his shoulders like a lost sheep, and bring him to some place of safety where he could try to fix all his problems in the name of Jesus. But something in him for weeks has been telling him he needed to learn how to intercede for guys, that the battle is a spiritual one devouring them, preying on them, and his footwork is pathetic against the principalities.

Now, I've been praying more in the past years but I quickly realized that I haven't been so closely attached to the "results" or fruit of my praying. But as Chris and I went to pray in the sanctuary I found myself with an ache in me for Jesus to really show up for this guy right then and save him from all that was coming against him. I felt powerless and overwhelmed. I knew my quiet praying was too small, so I crossed over and began shouting in tongues. I didn't know what else to do.

Then I heard Chris pray; Chris who doesn't feel like he knows how to pray. Chris prays scandalous prayers (he's a scandalous guy and works with scandalous guys). Chris prays, "Jesus, I tell these guys about You all the time; that You love them, that You show up to save, and if You don't do this I'm not sure I want to follow You." (!) My eyes sprang open! Dang, I'm not very comfortable with that, but it reminded me of one of David's psalms. My version is more like "come on God!" And I know how much Jesus loves Chris and Chris' guys.

Visitors

It's been a time of reconnecting.

Susan dove headfirst into Facebook and found connections with her old Camp Firwood - http://www.thefirs.org/index.php?page=camp_firwood - so we went down for late night on the Fourth of July, got to hear 4th graders talk about what they learned about God at camp that week and connected with old staff, some of whom are still there.

Kevin and Rachel Kreiss came up for the day on Saturday - our last opportunity to hang out as they prepare to go to Duke in North Carolina in August for Rachel to start nursing school and Kevin to discover the next thing God has in store for him and them.

Yesterday Jonathan, Tiffany and Madeleine Werner were our first visitors to not come to Bellingham, but who came to the English worship service at Tierra Nueva. It was great to show them around so they could see the place they were praying for.

Bondage Breaking

I've begun meeting with a couple of the young Hispanic men who are part of Tierra Nueva having come from the jail ministry, and started reading through Neil Anderson's The Bondage Breaker together. At the end of our first discussion and time of prayer, one man quoted, "there are many Christians like me out there leading lives of 'quiet desperation' due to the attack of demonic forces." He said, "that's me!" I told him that many people live in the quiet desperation because they don't believe in demons who come to steal, kill and destroy. He was amazed, "Don't they read the bible?" I said yes, but we have explained away demons with scientific and medical explanations. He said that we are supposed to believe the bible and then he laughed and said, "I think they have a demon." I agreed that it might be true. Then he said, "If I was a thief and was breaking into someone's house, I would wipe down my fingerprints and every trace that I was there."